The bible tells us in Ephesians 6:12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood... I think we often forget that when we have someone in our life who is causing us harm, who is frustrating us, who is being unforgivably wrong- it is not the person specifically who is the problem. There are other forces at work. Forces we cannot see. It is so easy to make the war against the person who we see sitting in front of us. But that is a big mistake.
The verse goes on to say that it is "against the spiritual forces of this dark world and against dark the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms". Satan and his minions would have us believe that we are fighting against the people in our lives, and at times to a certain extent we are. But focusing on that is a big mistake that makes the "spiritual forces of evil" cheer and keeps the battle in the enemies court. We need to see each battle for what it is- a spiritual battle. We cannot fight a spiritual battle in a physical world. The only way to fight the battle is spiritually.
Psalms 3:1-3 says "O,Lord, how many are my foes! How many rise up against me! Many are saying of me, 'God will not deliver him.' But you are a shield around me, O, Lord; you bestow glory on me and lift up my head."
We often doubt the ability of God to come to our aid, though we don't admit this even to ourselves. But the evidence is clear- we are a nation addicted to anti-depressants and anti-anxiety medication. Our worry and our strife is evidence of our lack of faith that God is taking care. During a particularly stressful trial it is understanding to have the evidence of this in our life. However, do we then turn it around and pray and fast and give every free moment of our life in prayer and seeking the will of God? Typically no. I can attest that this is typically not the first thing I do either.
It is important in our trials to #1 remember who we are fighting against. Fighting the wrong enemy is a critical mistake that takes us out of the battle. The #2 thing to remember is that it is all in the power of God. He loves us incredibly and truly -as Romans 8:28 says "works all things together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose" He is looking out for our best interest- even if that is not what we would think is in our best interest. An old pastor of mine would always say- "God is more concerned with our character than our comfort" . In my life I have found that to be very true. There are spiritual reasons that you may be going through any given trial in your life. The best thing to do is find out from the creator and author of your life why you are going through that trial, and not to look at another person as the cause of this situation. Drawing into your Father in Heaven, turning it all back to a spiritual battle is the best way and sometimes the only way to overcome the problem.
I am not here as someone who has not been through the spiritual wringer. I have been there. I have fought the battle both ways. I can personally say that when I learned that nothing outside of the will of God and my own spiritual uniting with my Lord and savior would help me- ever. That was a real awakening for me. My prayer is that everyone would come to that place, the place where they learn that life begins on your knees. There is an awakening that will occur, better than anything in the world.